7 Ways of getting over a break up

By Irene Migwi -

 

Let's talk about heart breaks. What do you do when someone breaks your heart? Do you become Joe Goldberg? Do you give up on love and become miserable? Getting your heart broken can be devastating, and leave you feeling hopeless about life. But I am here to tell you that all hope is not lost. You will get over your ex. You will lift yourself up again and you will heal. And one day, you will even smile again.
 
 pink flower with water droplets
 
Here are a few tips on how to get over a break up, particularly a nasty one. 
 

ALLOW YOURSELF TO FEEL THE PAIN

I know this does not sound as comforting as you had hoped, but actually the only way to get over a breakup, is to get through it. Process the feelings, accept that you have been hurt, and know that you will get better with time. The more you pretend to be fine, the more distressed you will feel. Let it all out. Cry, scream, or shout if possible. Just get it out of your system. 

 grayscale photography of person on beach

 

DON’T BECOME YOUR FEELINGS

So you have been heartbroken and you have cried all night, maybe even for a few days. You feel low and unexcited about everything. But does this mean that you go on like this forever? NO! You gave your heart to the wrong person and they broke your heart. Do not let it break you too. Turn your focus to yourself, and give yourself the same kind of love you were willing to give to somebody else. Soon enough, you will start to glow with joy and you will be okay.
 person crying beside bed

 

ELIMINATE UNHEALTHY BEHAVIORS

Try and identify any impulses you may have that are unhealthy and work on them. Do you get sudden urges to text your ex and insult them? Do you feel like shaming them and bad mouthing them among your common friends? This is an indication that you are still hurting on the inside and you need to heal. You are responding to this pain by lashing out at your ex. The best thing to do is to acknowledge that you still feel hurt and begin the healing process. If you don’t , the pain will keep trying to come out in form of toxic abusive behavior. 
 

 CUT OFF COMMUNICATION WITH YOUR EX

 It is very tempting to want to keep in touch with your ex. But if your ex was that amazing, then why did you break up? In order to be truly free to get over your ex, you must cut off all communication with them. Texts, calls, social media. And yes, no stalking. 
 
 
man in black hoodie and black hat holding fire
 
Do not go to their social media to have a peek. You may find more pain there. It is okay to want to seek closure and understand why you guys didn’t work out, so that you can finally move on for good. Understand that you will not always have closure. Some relationships just don’t work out. Some people will just never see how amazing you are. It is their loss. Just let it go and keep being the amazing individual that you are.
 

TALK TO SOMEONE YOU TRUST

Going through a break up alone can be devastating. You don’t have to bear all the pain alone. Talk to your friend or family member or anyone you can trust. Open up about how you really feel. Sharing with someone, getting counsel, and being reminded that you are not alone can be very beneficial.

 

 

CREATE NEW ROUTINES

You may be left feeling idle and empty after a breakup, especially if you used to do everything with your ex. Don’t lose hope. All is not lost. This is the perfect time to try out new things. 
 
What is that thing you always wanted to try out but never could because you had to spend time with your bae? Have you always wanted to travel, or go camping, or even try out a new hobby? Whatever it is, now is the perfect time to explore yourself. 
 
This world is full of wonder. Go out and live a little.   
 
 exercising woman on mat

DATE AGAIN

When your heart is broken, it can be easy to declare that you will never love again. But please don’t give up on love. Don’t let one person destroy your chance of finding the right person for you. The one who will appreciate all your efforts and love you back with the same intensity is still out there, looking and waiting for you. You just have to heal first.
 
 red rose in clear glass bottle
 
 

Talk to a professional life coach today about your broken heart

 When going through a break up, it can be hard to know who to trust with your struggles. Do you need someone to talk to about what you are going through? Give us a call today. You are not alone. You will know what it feels like to be happy again and your heart will heal. 

 

TELEPHONE:         +254 716605610

EMAIL:                     wangarimigwike@gmail.com

INSTAGRAM:          Coach Wangari Migwi

FACEBOOK:           Coaching with Wangari Migwi
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 

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